


Prince of the golden Halls

by BonesXLI



Series: Tony/Loki Oneshots [4]
Category: Iron Man - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Dreams, Family Reunions, Loki Feels, Repressed Memories, So many emotions, Tony Feels, Tony and Loki are not together, aesir!tony, mentions of torture, tony is reincarnated
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-10
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-11 21:20:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1178051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BonesXLI/pseuds/BonesXLI
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He didn’t remember everything, but sometimes the memories came with a flash. </p><p>Tony has had dreams of an unknown world since he was a child. One day he meets a familiar person and what he learns will change his life forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In another life, we were happy

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta'd, I'm sorry for any mistakes.
> 
> This is an AU and takes place after the Avengers are meeting the first time on the helicarrier and before the Chitauri attack.

He didn’t remember everything, but sometimes the memories came with a flash. _Golden halls, clear skies, rushing waterfalls_. At first Tony thought, those flashes were dreams, produced by his tired brain when he stayed in his lab for days and didn’t sleep. But they were too real, the things he felt were too real. _Joy, warm sunshine, fear, cold winds._ The first time he had some sort of flashback, he was seven. He was in his room, little fingers clutching a small robot, and cried. His father had rejected him. Again. Every time Tony built something, he would walk to his father’s lab and show him the object. But every time his father wouldn’t spare even one look at him. An angry “Anthony, not yet, don’t you see that I don’t have time for your nonsense” was everything he would get. Sometimes he would run to his mother or their butler Jarvis and they would praise him for his talent, but they couldn’t make the pain go away he felt because of his father’s rejection. So he would mostly go to his room and hide there, tears running down his cheeks. He valued the comfort of sleep. When he was sleeping, he didn’t have to think about his father, his mother or Jarvis. He wouldn’t feel pain or see disappointed looks directed at him. While he was sleeping, he was free. But not that day, because that day he dreamed.  
  
 _He was running over a field, the sun warming his face. He chased a big black dog, no a wolf. He felt the wind and laughed. They reached a golden city and stopped there, catching their breath. The wolf nuzzled his cheek and he laughed. “Yes, you win Fenrir.” People moved past them, children ran around them, some guards on horses saluted to them. And somewhere a voice called them home._  
  
After his first dream, they came more often. Tony relished in them, because in this dreams, he was happy. But with the time they grew worse. His dream-self wasn’t a happy boy anymore; it grew to someone who walked in shadows, who was looked at with suspicion. Sometimes his dream-self would even cry. Tony decided that obviously no version of him could be happy and started to ignore them. After some years, they vanished completely. And his life went on.

 

Alarms blared through the tower. Tony cursed every goddamn villain outside and looked up from the piece of metal he was tinkering on. “Jarvis, what is it this time?” he sighed. He just came back from a really boring meeting on the helicarrier. Fury told them about a suspected threat, a god from Asgard named Loki. His brother Thor came to Earth to warn them of the god’s wrath. “Loki is dangerous.”, he said. “We thought him lost after he fell into the abyss, but our all-seeing guard Heimdall discovered him with an army of Chitauri and Thanos.” After their confused looks, he explained that Thanos would attack earth and he was so powerful, that it would be difficult to beat him. Thor promised them help from Asgard, the realm of eternity would send them only their finest warriors. But the Avengers were still worried and stayed hours in the HQ to discuss battle plans and strategic things. The meeting ended without any breakthroughs and everyone just wanted to sleep and forget the burden they had on their shoulders. But apparently, someone didn’t want them to rest.

 “We sighted Loki. Barton is compromised and with him, Romanov and some agents are on their tails. Everyone has to be on alert, so get your ass out of the lab and wait for further commands.” answered him Fury’s voice. Before the genius could come up with a witty comeback the call was ended. _Goddamn motherfucker_ , Tony thought and stood up. “Hack into SHIELD servers, Jarvis, I want to have every live stream and data they have on Loki.” he ordered and went to the nearest bar to get a drink. He sipped at his scotch while Jarvis breached every poor firewall SHIELD had installed. After some minutes he had one file and the suspected position of the trickster god. He read through the (really short) file. SHIELD had nothing on that bastard, except that he was Thor’s brother, stole the Tesseract and could use magic. _Magic._ Tony scoffed. He’d like to get a near look at this, because nobody was messing with the laws of physic and surely not an alien from some golden planet. “How long is the flight from New York to Germany?” he asked absentmindedly and flicked through some pictures of the god. Something was familiar about that stature and the green eyes. It was almost as if he had seen the god before. The inventor shook his head. _Really, I didn’t have more than two glasses, I’m nowhere near drunk._ “Flight length estimated seven hours, sir.” answered his AI and the inventor straightened. “I think a visit to Europe is long overdue.”  
  
Nearly seven hours later Tony shot through the air. He was near Loki’s location, but he had to go faster because the trickster made his move and attacked a fundraiser event. Jarvis had hacked into the SHIELD intercom and he listened to Romanov giving orders. He still hadn’t forgiven her the stunt she pulled as his personal assistant entirely. He hated being spied on and showed that openly. But there was no time for holding grudges in the moment. From afar he could see the large crowd of people and the god shooting blue flashes through the air. A jet was hovering over them and _fucking hell was that Captain America fighting Loki?_ The inventor could see that the soldier stood no chance again the trickster and decided to step in. “Turn up AC/DC.”, he ordered his Al and flew through the dark night. “Agent Romanov”, he said, “did you miss me?” He was sure that the woman repressed a sigh and grinned. With a strong blast he sent Loki sprawling on the ground and landed with a well-trained elegance. He pointed his weapons at the god and opened his mouth to say something witty, but the words died on his tongue as he met the god’s eyes. Green eyes bored into brown.

_He cried. Hot tears streamed down his cheeks. “I’m sorry, I never wanted that, you have to believe me!” A woman with golden hair kneeled before him and tried to calm him. “Shh, it’s alright, nothing bad happened, you were lucky, small one.” Her comforting arms wrapped around him and he buried his head in her shoulders. He let the tears flow freely and the sobs wrack his small body. The woman just held him and murmured sweet nothings into his ear. “Everything will be okay, don’t despair, your father will fix it. Shh, sleep little one, I will stay with you until he comes back.”_

With a gasp Tony snapped out of the flashback. His heart was racing and a tear rolled down his cheek. In his chest he could feel the echo of the pain his dream-self felt. “Sir?” Jarvis asked worried. “It’s alright, Jarvis.”, he answered and breathed deeply in and out. “Mr. Stark”, the soldier next to him said and he returned a small nod. “Captain Rogers.” He turned back and saw that Loki had given up and was sitting there, without armor and weapon, the green eyes trained on the red-golden suit. Meanwhile Romanov managed to land the jet and agents poured out of it. The intercom buzzed and Fury’s rumbling voice could be heard. “Good job, Rogers and Stark. Bring him back to the HQ.” Stark saluted to Natasha and took off into the air. He had the suspicion that Loki still looked at him. “Jarvis, location of the helicarrier.”  His AI answered quickly. “Currently over New Jersey, estimated flight length over 7 hours, sir.” Tony bit his cheek. He had seven hours to get himself together. “As fast as possible Jarvis, and turn up the music.” He didn’t want to hear himself think.

Half way through Tony began to feel dizzy. His eyes closed on their own accord and he desperately wanted to sleep. “Jarvis, how long?”, he asked through gritted teeth. “2 hours, sir.” _Well, a quick nap can’t hurt._ “Put the suit on automatic flight, I’m gonna take a quick nap.” He slurred already and barely waited for Jarvis’ confirmation before he closed his eyes and sleep overwhelmed him.  
  
 _Fear filled his chest. Rough hands grabbed him and dragged him outside into the night. A scary man with an eye-patch waited for them in the middle of the rainbow bridge. “Let me go, please!” He begged but nobody helped him. The scary man raised his staff and spoke in a dark voice. “From today on, I, the king of Asgard, exile you from the realm of eternity. You have proven to be…” He was interrupted by a scream. “No!” He saw a man in green running towards them. “Please don’t do this! It wasn’t his mistake, please, let me keep him!” The man’s voice cracked and he looked like he was going to cry any moment. The scary man’s look softened. “No, Loki.” The boy felt like his world shattered. Despair burned through him and the tears started to fall again. He struggled and wanted to run to Loki, behind him, but the guards held him in place. “We cannot trust him. I’m sorry, my son.” The man in green, Loki, wanted to run to the boy, but another pair of guards grabbed him. “I hereby bind your powers, strip you from immortality and exile you to Midgard. May you find there a new life.” The hands pushed him over the edge. The air was pressed out of his lungs as he fell into the abyss, his mind was for a wonderful second blank before **black** filled it. **Black** filled his entire being and he fell. Before he lost his consciousness he thought he heard a screamed “No!” _

“Sir? Sir, please wake up. You have almost reached your destination.” The voice with the British accent dragged him back into consciousness. Tony sucked in air and opened his eyes. He was still shocked about the new dream _(or memory?)_. _Loki. The man who looked like Nick Fury’s twin had called the man in green Loki. Loki like in Loki, god of mischief? The crazy god who wanted to bring freedom to earth? Who wanted to rule the very planet Tony lived on?_ The genius sighed. He had so many questions.  
  
With a heavy thud he landed on the helicarrier. The suit folded itself into a portable case. Tony grabbed it and walked to an important looking guy. “Hey, care to show me the way to the bridge?” The guy looked at him like a horse would look at an insect. _Really, has he never seen Tony Stark before,_ the inventor asked himself sourly. He just wanted to open his mouth to deliver a snarky comment as the agent turned around with a quick “Follow me please, sir.” The way was short and easy to remember. _Lack of security_ , noted the genius. _As if nobody could attack the helicarrier._ He scoffed and walked over to the table, where Fury, Romanov and the rest of the Avengers. “Stark, you could have been here faster.”, greeted Fury him and the playboy rolled his eyes. “Where’s Loki?”, he blurted out before he could restrain himself. Agent Romanov raised an eyebrow and the others stared. “In a nice cage, built for homicidal people like him.”, came the clipped answer. “I want to see him.” His request was met with five glares, ranging from disbelief to suspicion. _Oh fuck._ “I mean, I want to see the oh so almighty god who thought he could rule us so easily.” He gave them a bright fake smile, but not everyone seemed to buy it. Nick Fury stared at him silently. Just as Tony wanted to say he should forget this request, the director nodded. “Five minutes. And no provoking.” Tony gave him an innocent _do you really think I would do that?-_ look and followed two guards. On the way he pulled out his Stark phone and gave Jarvis the silent command to hack SHIELD’s cameras and intercoms. He smiled. They really thought they had enough firewalls to block out Jarvis, the most advanced AI of the world. The guards stopped before a metal door and typed in some long security code _(not that Jarvis couldn’t hack them)_ and let him into the room. In the middle was a big glass cage. His eyes met Loki’s and he fought the rush of lost memories _(gold, sun, Fenrir, woman, Loki, pain, **black** )_ that filled his mind. While his silent fight the guards left him alone with the god and closed the door again. Tony calmed himself and waited until the red light of the cameras vanished, before he looked fully at Loki. The god’s expression was mixed; he could see shock, pain, disbelief, relief and something darker. The leather-clad trickster walked towards him and put a hand on the glass. His emerald eyes searched Tony’s face. “Anthony..?”, he whispered. Tony took a step towards him and was about to how the hell the god knew his name as Loki’s next words caused the floor to slip out under his feet. “You have grown, my son.”   
  
Tony stared with wide eyes at the god. He suddenly could solve the puzzle in his mind. “Father..?”, he asked incredulously. The word _Asgard_ echoed in his mind. “I don’t understand…”, he added confused and Loki nodded. The god smiled at him gently with a protecting gleam in his eyes. “I will explain everything to you, Anthony, but we have to go.” With that he stepped through the glass like it was air and took Tony’s hand. The inventor felt something build around their bodies and held his breath. _Magic exists really._ The last thing Tony saw before Loki teleported them somewhere, was Nick Fury standing in the door and looking at him betrayed and with an _I should have known you are not trustworthy_ -sneer.

Loki brought them into an apartment. Green dominated the look and Tony knew in an instant that this was Loki’s. The god motioned him to sit down and the inventor took place on the green couch. Loki sat opposite from him. “I’m sure you have questions.” Tony stayed mute and just nodded. It was just too much. One second he was a genius, playboy, philanthropist and billionaire, the other he was the son of a god. Loki looked at him with a soft smile and encouraged him to talk. “I had…these dreams since I was a child. I mean, I thought they were dreams, but at the same time they seemed too real.”, Tony began hesitantly and raised his gaze. Loki was listening intently. “They showed me a golden city. Sometimes I would play with a wolf…” At that Loki perked up. “Fenrir?”, he asked and the inventor nodded. “But they grew worse, I don’t know why. I did something wrong and it went downhill. And today, I dreamed that…” He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. Loki covered Tony’s hand with his own and rubbed small circles on it. The simple gesture gave him enough power to manage a crooked smile. “They took me away. From you, I mean. They took me away and a king from Asgard banned me. They tossed me into the abyss.” The painful memory still shook Tony to his core. He watched his supposed father. The god looked sad and remorseful. “As you now know, you are from Asgard, but you never were entirely a god.”, Loki began to explain. “I was at Midgard for a short visit and I met your mother, a princess of some kingdom. It was a long time ago, in the ancient times of your world. I stayed some years with her, but shortly after you were born, she died in an accident.” Loki smiled sadly. “She didn’t accept von of Idunn’s apples, because we didn’t know if you would be immortal too or not. And then it was too late. I had no reason for staying on Midgard any longer so I took you with me back to Asgard. The Allfather wasn’t thrilled to see you, but my mother Frigga loved you from the first moment on. After some time it was clear that you were a god and you were accepted as prince of Asgard. But we didn’t know you had magic and after we discovered that Odin decided you were too dangerous. You almost killed a child when you grew angry after you insulted it.” At that Tony sucked in a shocked breath. Loki quickly calmed him. “It wasn’t your fault; you didn’t know about your powers and couldn’t control them. I tried to explain that to Odin, but he didn’t listen and he banned you. After that I left Asgard and searched for you, but I never found you. I think you were reincarnated a few times over the centuries. That’s because I couldn’t find you. You always looked the same, but sometimes you were born as a prince and sometimes as a poor boy, living in the streets. ” Loki’s eyes were glassy with unshed tears. Tony wrapped his arms around the god and hugged him tightly. “I’m so happy I found you.”, murmured the trickster and Tony smiled softly. “Good to be home again.”, he answered.

They talked hours, Loki catching up to what happened in his son’s life. He was shocked to hear about the pain, betrayal and rejection Anthony had to endure in this life. With every sad smile or horrified look of his son, he began to hate Odin more than he already did. He swore to himself that he would kill everyone who dared to hurt his son. But he also felt relieved when Tony told him about Pepper, Jarvis, his robots and the Avengers.

The thought that Tony was in fact a god, amazed him to no end. “And magic? You have to tell me about magic.” Loki chuckled. His son hadn’t lost his excitement. “Maybe you should explore it yourself.”, he told Anthony and the inventor rolled his eyes. “Yeah sure, just give me some magic…no wait.” He stared incredulous at the god. “I don’t have…?” As he saw the smug grin on Loki’s face he just gaped. “Of course you have magic, son, it’s just locked away.” He put his hand over Tony’s arc reactor and closed his eyes. After some moments, the genius felt it. A small tug inside him, something fighting his way out of a cage. A warm feeling flooded him, made him dizzy and seemed to run through his veins. When Tony concentrated on it, the magic buzzed as if it were alive and reacted to his call. He smiled and opened his eyes. “It feels amazing.”, Tony whispered. He looked at the other god, no, he looked _at his father_ and felt so content and happy like never before. But a small shadow still remained. The inventor really didn’t want to dampen the mood, but the question burned on his tongue. “Why did you do it?”, he asked silently.

Loki enjoyed the happiness he saw, when Anthony welcomed his magic. _You are truly a god now_ , he thought proudly. But too quickly the joy was washed away and replaced with a frown. The god just wanted to ask if something was wrong, but Tony beat him to it. “Why did you do it?” Loki knew what his son referred to and tensed slightly. He remembered his pain after finding out that he was a Jotun, the world-shattering despair after failing to find his son and the **_black_** of the void. When the Chitauri found him, he was relieved. But the illusion was soon shattered and he found himself in a world of torture and pain. He sighed.  
“After my search for you was fruitless, I went back to Asgard to bring justice. But then I found out I was a Jotun.” His son frowned. “You surely don’t remember the stories, but Jotnar are frost giants. They are seen as monsters, as ruthless people who wage war. Odin, the Allfather, found me on Jotunheim after a great war ended. My real parents left me in the cold to die.” The god shuddered and his son hugged him again. Loki relaxed in his arms and calmed his turmoil of feelings. He owed his son this explanation. “He took me with them to Asgard, hid my true heritage with an illusion and raised me as a prince of Asgard. After I found out, I was devastated. It was just too much to deal with, I lost you and then I found out my whole life was a lie. So I decided…that I had enough. I let go of everything and jumped into the void.” He sucked in a deep breath. Anthony carded his fingers through the god’s hair to calm him and Loki smiled bitterly. _I should comfort my son, not he his father._ “The Chitauri found me. They are an alien race and Thanos ruled them. Thanos…he is a powerful being, Asgard barely can meet him in battle. He wanted me to subjugate Midgard so he can use your world as a gateway to the other realms. He wants to rule the entire universe.” Anthony made a thoughtful noise. “Why did you agree?”, he asked. Loki shuddered. “I didn’t, but they were persistent. They tortured me, and, and, I finally had to give in, you have to believe me! I would never bring such danger to the realms, please, please believe me!” Tears started to fall and Tony brushed them away. “Shh, I believe you.”, he told his father who sagged relieved against him.  
  
Tony was frozen. He couldn’t imagine the pain his father went through. He knew what it meant to be tortured, but he was barely three months in this cave and the Chitauri had years to break Loki. Anger fueled him and tiny sparks of magic covered his fingers. They were glowing blue, the same blue as his arc reactor. He stood up and stared at the horizon. His eyes were filled with a dark emotion.  “We will find them, father, and we will burn them.”, he said and his voice was laced with a lethal promise.  Loki smiled a feral grin and joined his son. Together they would get their revenge.


	2. Acceptance and Betrayal go hand in hand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So like I promised Chapter 2!  
> I'm still not a native speaker, I'm sorry for any mistakes.

A glowing portal opened directly in one of SHIELD’s conference rooms. The gathered Avengers drew their weapons, a look of horrified anticipation on their faces. Their stances only grew more hostile as they saw Tony stepping through the portal, Loki following close behind.

Natasha watched the formerly respected man, who had gone rogue. She didn’t understand why Tony broke Loki out. Was it all a plot? Had Tony been a secret villain under his thick layers of facades? She knew everything about his history, about the Merchant of Death-days, Afghanistan and the forging of Iron Man. But it was illogical that Tony wanted to rule the world together with a homicidal god.

Tony stepped into the room and watched with a sick feeling in his stomach his former colleague’s looks of betrayal and hatred. He forced his trembling hands to still and was grateful for his father’s supporting presence directly behind him. “So…”, he began awkwardly but was immediately cut off by a seething Fury. “What do you think you were doing, Stark? We trusted you. We relied on you and your suit and what do you do? You betrayed us. How could you?” His words were met with nods of agreement. Tony felt the color drain from his face as he heard these words. It felt like someone punched him, but he knew that their assumptions were justified. He had broken out Loki and had vanished with him for hours and left them without an explanation. The inventor felt Loki shift behind him and that helped him to calm his mind. “Please, you have to listen.” He breathed in deeply. “I have an explanation for this.”

She narrowed her eyes to slits and studied the genius with a frown. Within seconds she noticed Loki’s protecting stance and the gleam in his eyes. He watched Tony like people watched someone they thought long lost. Natasha also saw how Tony calmed as the trickster god shifted a little and reminded the genius of his presence. She didn’t have hostile motivations towards Tony anymore; she just wanted to find out what had happened in the hours they were away. Fury looked at her after Tony’s plea and she gave a small nod. The director of SHIELD sighed. “Make it quick.”, he demanded. At her left side Barton lowered his bow a little bit and Roger’s grip on his shield relaxed a little bit. Thor wasn’t present; he had gone back to Asgard to ask for Heimdall’s help. Only Bruce seemed unperturbed what a big relief was because nobody wanted to deal with the Hulk right now. Instead the doctor was relaxed and watched Tony with an admiring glint in his eyes. Natasha frowned again. She knew that Bruce and Tony got along together wonderfully, but it looked like the scientist knew more than them about Tony’s reason for going rogue. For now she wouldn’t kill anyone. No, Natasha thought, at first I want to hear their sorry excuse for trying to subjugate the world. And maybe she would slay them in terrible ways later.

Tony cleared his throat. “Well, you know, since I was a child I had these dreams about a strange place.” He didn’t tell them about the darkness of some dreams and the pain he had to endure. “They showed me a golden city and a beautiful world. I never paid them much attention; I thought they were just some crazy dreams.” He looked sideways to his father and the god gave him a gently smile which urged him to go on. “And when I first saw pictures of Thor and Loki they were somehow familiar. After I met Loki the dreams came back and they were painful and not happy at all.” He managed a lop-sided grin. “I had lots of questions and knew that only Loki could answer them so I decided to see him.” He looked at Fury and saw the man watching him with a hard face. “And I learned that I’m in fact a reincarnated god from Asgard.” With a smug feeling he saw the turmoil break out between the Avengers. Barton jumped at his feet and was close to attacking Tony. “Liar”, the agent spat, “don’t you see he’s telling you lies? He has you under control; snap out of it, Tony! You don’t have to be like him.” Steve raised his shield and was ready to knock out Tony at any moment, while Fury stared at them with a totally shocked expression. Bruce just sat there and watched Loki and Natasha just studied both of the gods.

The Russian agent wasn’t perturbed in any way after Tony’s revelation. Now the puzzle pieces fitted together. It was clear why Loki wanted Tony to be on his side. The genius was a perfect partner with his intellect, suits and an unpredictable villain. Nobody could know what the man did next and he could take them out all with a plan that was the complete opposite what they thought he would do. Natasha was relieved that he never had any motivation to take over the world, because with the public eating out of his hands, not even SHIELD could stop him. And now he apparently had the powers of a god and maybe even magic like Loki. Dangerous.

But a small thing still disturbed her, something didn’t fit. That Tony was a god didn’t explain Loki’s protectiveness. She also knew that the inventor didn’t tell them everything. With narrowed eyes she watched as Loki stepped forward and everyone went from confusion or anger to hostility. But the trickster god didn’t show any signs of attacking and just put a hand on Tony’s shoulder. “You should listen to what he has to say. We don’t have time. The Chitauri are coming and we can’t stop them without a proper plan. So listen to Anthony and accept his newly found status as a prince from Asgard.” The word prince caused a sharp intake of breath from five people. “I will return when you have calmed yourself. Until then, do not harm him or I will return every pain you cause my son tenfold.” With that he vanished into thin air and left Tony in a silent room with the Avengers gaping at him. “Son…?”, murmured Steve confused and incredulous.

Well, thanks Dad, Tony thought sourly.

Natasha lost her calm appearance for a second and stared at the inventor. He was Loki’s son? That explained Loki’s behavior, but still it was a completely incalculable turn of events. “So what are you going to do now?”, she asked the sort-of-new-god because the rest of the Avengers still seemed to be too shocked to do something, including Fury (which Natasha found incredible amusing and she knew that Tony had to keep himself from laughing at the utterly disbelieving look on the director’s face). Tony seemed to be grateful for her question and sent her a small smile, one of those who weren’t faked and reached his eyes. “Well, like Lo-my father said, the Chitauri are coming. They are under the command of Thanos, a powerful being. Loki told me that Asgard barely can withstand him, so I guess Earth needs a really good plan and defense.” Barton growled at that and glared at the god. “And pray tell why did Loki lead him to Earth? If it weren’t for him, we wouldn’t have an army waiting outside of our doors.” Tony shifted nervously and swallowed. “Thanos would be coming without Loki, too. My father was just a nice pawn for him. And he didn’t have a choice, he had to help the mad titan.” The word went unspoken, but everyone knew what the philanthropist meant. Torture. Natasha knew about the horrors torture could bring and she knew that Loki did his best to deny Thanos his wish. When even Loki was powerless against this alien, the world would have to collect every weapon, every man power available. But to achieve this, the countries had to work together and the agent knew that this would be a futile attempt. But at first they had to collect information. “Why aren’t you still living on Asgard?” That question seemed to unsettle Tony. He began to fidget. “My mother was from earth, so nobody thought that I had some powers. But nevertheless I was a god and was allowed to live on Asgard. But after some years, my powers awakened and Odin, Thor’s father and the king of Asgard decided that I was too dangerous and banned me from the realm. I was reincarnated on Earth for more than three hundred years. But now, after I came in contact with a magical being, my sleeping godhood and magic awakened. So yeah, I don’t know if my banishment is still up-to-date.” The man lowered himself on one of the couches and slumped tiredly. Natasha felt compassion for him. It had to be exhausting for him, finding out that he was in fact a god and Loki’s son in one day.

Bruce pushed his cup of coffee to the inventor and Tony thanked him with a little smile. The doctor just nodded and let him know that the genius could count on him. Rogers and Barton still seemed to be confused and frozen. Fury showed his distrust openly. Within a heartbeat Natasha made her decision and stood up gracefully. She put her hand on Tony’s shoulder and squeezed it gently. “Go home, you must be tired. We can talk about battle plans tomorrow. Loki is waiting for you, but don’t forget to call Pepper, she has to be mad with worry by now.” After that she left the room and walked down the floors to her small room.

Shortly before she entered it, Barton caught up with her. “Do you really trust them? What if Loki controls him?”, he asked. Natasha understood that the mind-controlling still haunted him, but he would get over it, he was an agent after all and a strong man. “Yes”, she answered simply, “I didn’t saw Loki, the homicidal god today. I only saw a desperate father who found his son after centuries of waiting. I know what it means to be taken away from parents, because I lost mine when I was a child. You don’t know what it means for a father to search for his son year for year, because you don’t have any children. But I can comprehend that at least in a small way and I honestly don’t want to go through the same pain Loki had to. So yes, I trust them and I’m giving both of them a second chance, before everyone deserves one.” With that she left a by now gaping Barton and closed her door, not before seeing a smiling Bruce nodding at her in approval.

Tony left the helicarrier with the suit he had left there when he left with Loki. It felt good to be flying again. Jarvis was already up-to-date and proved once again that he was the best AI one could have. On his way back to Stark Tower, where Loki currently resided (yes, Jarvis told him that), he called Pepper. The poor woman worried too much for him, but Tony was so grateful that she existed, that he couldn’t thank every god enough for here. Well, from now on I can pray to myself, he thought amused and made a mental note to ask Loki if he had some sort of title. God of Best Wit Ever or something like that. He chuckled at that and smiled. He was really stressed when he had to tell the Avengers the important parts of what happened, but Nat and Bruce helped him a lot with their open show of trust. While he pondered over the reaction of the team and Fury, Stark Tower came in sight and he smiled again.

The inventor landed gracefully on the terrace and his machines disassembled his suit. With long steps he strived into the living room of his penthouse. Loki was waiting for him, browsing through some of Tony’s physics books. At his son’s arrival he looked up and smiled. Anthony seemed relaxed and he guessed that the talk with the team of heroes went good. The inventor slumped onto the couch next to him and yawned. The trickster god smiled fondly. He had lost too much time with his son and hadn’t had the chance of seeing him while he grew up to be a fine man. He regretted giving up the search, but deep inside he knew that Odin had hidden his son from him and he would have never found Anthony.

The god guessed that after the Allfather fell into his Odinsleep, his powers weakened and some minor spells stopped working. He was grateful for that, because now he had at least a little bit family back. “And how did your team react?” Loki asked and grimaced at the strange word team. He still had to adjust to the modern way of speaking Midgard developed. His son brightened. “Oh it went great”, he told excited, “Nat and Bruce give us a chance, Steve and Barton will come around and Fury surely won’t do anything at the moment.” Loki nodded thoughtful. “And the Chitauri?”, he asked and hated himself for the way he always tensed when he or someone else mentioned that god-forsaken race.

Tony scooted closer and placed his head on his father’s shoulder and the trickster had to smile at that. It reminded him of the days when Anthony still was young and would do the same every time he was tired. His son hadn’t changed entirely, after all. “Do you want to try some basic magic before you go to sleep? It could be useful.” At that Anthony’s weariness vanished and he looked at his father in anticipation. And Loki taught him. They started with little things like producing an energy shield which would protect them from several harmful weapons. His son’s magic was light blue like the glow of his arc reactor. Blue represented intelligence and stubbornness in Asgard. How very accurate, Loki thought amused.

He just wanted to explain how teleportation worked, when he noticed that Tony had dozed off. The trickster god smiled and carried his son to bed, like in the old days when Anthony was a small boy. He pulled the blankets over his son and kissed him softly on the forehead. “You will be very strong, Anthony. Your magic is strong, it even rivals mine. Together we’ll beat the Chitauri and everyone who dares to touch you. And after all that we will go back to Asgard and you will be finally home.” With these words he left Anthony’s room and seated himself in the living room, where he began to search through several files concerning SHIELD and the Avengers with Jarvis’ help.

He didn’t notice the small drone making its way outside and back to one of SHIELD’s secret bases in the underground of Staten Island.

In a dark room seven worried people looked at Fury while he told them what happened earlier that day. “We have the information that an agent of SHIELD infiltrated Stark Industries as Stark’s assistant. What did she find out?” A stern looking lady asked and Fury scoffed. “Nothing what we didn’t know before. Stark is volatile, self-obsessed and doesn’t play well with others. He is a risk to the safety of the world’s population. And he has magic now; he may even rival Loki after he learns to control these powers.” The worried glances didn’t change. “What do the Avengers think?” Fury frowned slightly. “Two of them have given them a second chance already, we can’t persuade them otherwise. One is still in Asgard, but he will surely side with his brother and nephew. The other two are unsure what to do, they are our only chance.” A bald man with glasses cleared his throat. “If he has magic, we can use him as a weapon.” Fury watched as every single member of the council looked greedily at the pictures of Stark. Magic was seen as a power in fairy tales, but not as a natural power somebody can control. With Stark the council and SHIELD would have very much power on their hands and they could even control Loki with his son as bait.

Outside this room two humans crept in the shadows. Clint opened the door a little bit and together with Steve he slipped inside. They stood beside Fury as the council made the decision. "Take Stark into custody and contain him sedated in a safe cell. He'll be a perfect weapon and an interesting object for our scientists. Use as much force as you need." Two deadly agent and one solier nodded in approval.

Nobody saw the woman with the red hair crouching in the shadows, shocked after her friend's and SHIELD's betrayal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I'm not sorry.
> 
> I want to thank everyone who left Kudos and/or comments on chapter 1. You really make me happy (:


	3. Pain shapes you, tears make you stronger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go, chapter 3!

Tony woke up with the sun in his face. For a wonderful moment he just lay there with closed eyes and smiled. He had a real father now. It had shocked Tony that he was of Asgard. He always had seen Earth as his home and it felt strange, knowing that in another life he lived on some kind of alien-planet. But the newly discovered truth had good sides, too. Tony now knew that nothing was wrong with him. Loki loved him, in a way Howard never did and never would. The thought of his real father always filled the inventor with warmth he only had felt for Jarvis. The butler will forever be more his father than Howard. Tony sighed. He still wanted to know more about his mother. He only knew that she was from earth and long dead, but Tony was fine with that. The genius still considered Maria Stark his mother and he knew that he could never feel the same love for a newly-discovered mother as for a newly-discovered father.

  
The alarms startled him from his thoughts. “Sir, you have a meeting with the Avengers in an hour.”  Jarvis informed him and he yawned resigned, before Tony got up. A quick shower woke him up and he walked into the kitchen, searching for coffee, but the sight which greeted him left him with an open mouth. He had expected Loki to hang around, but what he didn’t expect was a Loki making breakfast. The god stood in front of the stove and made pancakes. _Pancakes._ The homicidal god named Loki, who lived on Asgard, knew how to make _Pancakes_. On the table there stood two glasses with orange juice. _Well, I guess he wouldn’t welcome pizza and booze as a normal meal._ Tony thought amused and decided that worse could happen. He still had his coffee, didn’t he?

Loki turned around and discovered him standing there. The way the god’s eyes lit up as he saw his son made Tony’s heart ache. He mourned the time he had lost with his father. “Morning son, I made pancakes for us.” The god greeted him with a soft smile. Tony returned the smile and sat down. “Do they have pancakes on Asgard?” Loki scoffed. “No, the oafs only eat boar and drink meat. I’m relieved that Midgard has healthy things, they’re exactly the things you needed to eat.” Tony silently prayed that Jarvis would never tell the god about his days in the lab when he only ate cold pizza every few days. The meal passed in a comfortable silence and both of the gods enjoyed the atmosphere. “Will you come with me to SHIELD?” Tony asked and his father nodded. “Yes, your director wants to ask me some questions about the Mad Titan.” The inventor nodded and sipped at his orange juice. It didn’t taste that bad he decided and emptied the glass in a few seconds, while Loki shook his head and watched his son fondly.

Thirty minutes later the gods entered SHIELD HQ. An agent showed them to the room where the Avengers minus Natasha and Fury waited. Bruce greeted both of them warmly while the archer and Steve just nodded. They looked uncomfortable Loki noted and decided to look out for them. The same went for Fury who showed his distrust openly. Loki had a strange feeling, but he shoved it aside. His son trusted these people and the meeting was important. After they were seated Fury began to speak. They discussed the Mad Titan and the Chitauri for what felt like an eternity. The threat was big and Earth had to plan defenses and strategic attacks. It’d be deadly if they made one mistake. The time flew by and at some point Fury gave them a short pause. An agent brought them coffee, tea and even cookies. Bruce and his son raised eyebrows at the sudden friendliness and Loki felt his stomach churning. Something seemed off. He decided to search for the cause of his uneasiness later and sipped at his coffee. The liquid thankfully soothed his from the talking hoarse throat.

Loki closed his for some seconds and opened them quickly as a murderous looking Agent Romanov bolted into the room. “Don’t drink it!” She screeched and threw Bruce’s cup of tea at the next wall. “It’s drugged, it’s a trap!” Before anybody could process her words, dozens of agents filled the room. Loki sprang to his feet and reached out for his son, but suddenly pain seared through his body. Whatever in the coffee was, it attacked his magic and the god screamed. Strong arms pressed him down and Loki fell to his knees. Through a haze he saw that the soldier and the archer grabbed Tony and dragged his son away from him. Next to them Romanov and Bruce tried to fight their way to Tony. And Fury just stood at the head of the table and watched the proceedings with a smile. The thought of being away from his son filled Loki with anger. With a growl he freed himself and started a teleportation spell. His magic fought the drugs in his body and was weak, but it had to be enough. Loki blasted his attackers away and grabbed Natasha’s hand, who herself grabbed Bruce. With a shout his son broke free too and reached for Loki, who took hold of him.

After a second Loki managed to open a portal and they jumped through it, but halfway through the god felt Anthony’s hand slipping from his fingers. He saw his son’s helpless look as an invisible force pushed him back into the SHIELD room.  “No!” Loki shouted and wanted to jump after him, but Natasha and Bruce dragged him to the safe side of the portal. They looked sorrowful at the god, who broke down and shouted his son’s name over and over again, but the portal already closed and Tony was out of their reach. Natasha hugged the devastated god who screamed and cried and murmured soothing words in Russian. Her tears fell silently while Bruce sat helplessly beside her, his fists clenched and the drugs barely containing the Hulk inside him. They looked at each other and silently swore that they would rescue Tony and bring down SHIELD painfully, especially Rogers and Barton.

Tony woke with a racing heart and a headache. He felt dizzy and couldn’t think clearly. His movements were slow and he more felt than saw the handcuffs which shackled him to the wall. His entire body was restrained and they even put a collar on him. Anger filled him and cleared his mind. Tony knew that he was sedated, but the drugs weren’t supposed to weaken his mind, they were supposed to hinder his movements and repress his magic. The god still felt his magic in his veins, but he couldn’t call it to help. With a resigned sigh he sank back down and tried to search for a way to escape. He felt bitter, because he had been betrayed again. The betrayal of SHIELD didn’t hurt too much; he always knew that the organization would use every weapon they could get. What hurt was the betrayal of Steve and Clint, _his friends._ He had trusted hem, he had thought they were on his side. Tears filled his eyes but he fought them down and steeled his mind. He wouldn’t cry. He would stay strong until he could escape. A door opened but he couldn’t move his head.

A few heavy footsteps later Nick Fury stood beside him and looked down. Tony wanted to spit at him, to shout at him but his mouth didn’t work and he could only glare. The director studied him silently. “You will work for us”, he broke the silence, “your magic will serve our organization and the United States of America. Should we not need your powers for some time, SHIELD’s scientists will study and take samples of your magic. Loki, Bruce Banner and Natasha Romanov are to be killed on sight because they committed crimes against SHIELD.” With these words he left Tony alone. The inventor felt sick and his stomach churned. They wanted to use him as a weapon, as a guinea pig. Tears filled his eyes again and this time Tony didn’t stop them. They streamed down his cheeks silently. He wouldn’t be a human anymore. Anthony Lokison would cease to exist. He would only be an object. The god wanted to scream but his voice died in his throat, his body slumped and he stopped fighting the restraints. The fog filled his mind again and he slipped away into the dark.

 

Miles away Loki stopped to scream and trembled silently. For centuries he had searched for his son and never found him. After a thousand years he declared him dead and grieved for the next decades. In that time the god of mischief and chaos vanished and was replaced with the empty shell of a grieving father.   
After the reunion with his son Loki had someone to live for again. He was happy for the last two days, so happy and content with is life like he never had been before. But now they took away his son. Again he had lost the one he loved the most and Loki didn’t think he could go through the same pain again. He knew that his mind and his body would give up, if he couldn’t rescue his son. If Anthony died, Loki would cease to exist too.

On a realm far away Heimdall stood silently vigil. His all-seeing eyes were trained on Midgard. Humans were fickle, he thought. They lived only a few decades, but their thirst for knowledge was admirable. Their technology was more advanced than the ones of many other realms, even though they didn’t have magic. Heimdall loved to watch the life of humans. They lived fast without looking back and forced their way through the world. They learned from their own experience and from the experience of others. Mistakes were made, lies were told. But also happiness, truth, regrets and love existed on Midgard. Pain formed them, tears made them stronger. But the dark side of life never slept. Heimdall saw people losing loved ones to war, illness or age. Wars were waged, crimes committed and homes destroyed.   
Heimdall saw the fallen god freeing himself from the clutches of the Mad Titan. The guarding god didn’t know that Loki had been innocent. He smiled as the god found family and happiness. He had always liked the small boy with the brown eyes who listened eagerly to his stories. He felt anger at the betrayal of those pitiful mortals and swore revenge when the only two friends left promised to get Anthony back. He saw that they had no chance against an organization that was so powerful.  
With a heavy sigh he turned around and stepped into the open. Two guards stood there and nodded to them. “Send Thor to me.”


	4. Blood on my hands, emptiness in my heart

He was standing in the shadows, waiting. Two men were speaking, only few feet away. He didn’t listen to them; he only waited for the command. His fingers tightened their grip on the knife momentarily. “Make yourself ready.”A cold voice ordered him over the ear-piece he was wearing. Tony breathed in deeply and called for his magic. He closed his eyes as he felt the rush of pure energy in his body. He relished in the feeling, in the knowledge that he was alive. Because when he had executed the command, he would have to go back _there_. When he was _there_ , he felt empty. There were no feelings, no guilt, nothing except the praise from _them_. He would be laying in chains there, seconds flowing into minutes, hours would grow into days. When he glided into unconsciousness he sometimes would have dreams. He would see shadows, vaguely familiar faces. They would speak to him lovingly, sometimes exasperated but mostly warmly. He never could remember their words but after waking up he would feel loss and longing for a short moment until _they_ came to see him. Tony always dismissed the dreams because they felt like a life before them and he never had a life before _there._

Tony repressed a sigh and concentrated on the voices again. He knew that he would have to strike soon; otherwise one of them would flee. His fingers flexed and he hid the knife carefully because the tiniest silver glint would reveal his presence. “Kill them quickly.” The voice in his ear sent shivers down his back. “Make sure they don’t have a chance to scream, we wouldn’t want to wake up the neighborhood, would we? Strike now!” Tony charged even before the voice finished the command. His knife sliced along the throat of the first man and he lifted the second one with a blue-glowing hand before he could scream. Tony heard the first body falling to the ground and smiled. Air filled his lungs and magic streamed through him. _He was alive_. His victim struggled and panicked but Tony just laughed. He relished in the fear of the other one, it made him stronger. Tendrils of his magic wrapped itself around the throat of the man and Tony stepped back. His victim sunk to the ground, desperately clawing at the magic tendrils. Tony watched him struggle for a few moments before he moved in for the kill. He conjured up a glowing sword and with the elegance of a well-trained assassin he beheaded the man. The head landed on the ground with a sickening noise, but it filled Tony with satisfaction. He had just killed two men and they didn’t even have the chance to scream. _They_   would be proud.

  
Loki sat by a window and stared out into the dark. He was alone in the room, only a magical fire flickered in the fireplace. Bruce and Natasha were in the next two rooms, sleeping. Loki knew that he should rest too, but he couldn’t. SHIELD had captured Tony two weeks ago. Since two weeks his son was in the hands of the cruel organization. Nobody doubted that they would use Tony for their own advantage. SHIELD had officially declared Loki, Natasha and Bruce for enemies of the United States. They were to be killed on sight and that made getting Tony back very difficult. The god knew that they still had few allies, like Pepper Potts or Colonel Rhodes, but they couldn’t do much. Potts had declared Stark Tower as an extended building of Stark Industries and rescued Jarvis, the suits and the rest of Tony’s tech from SHIELD’s greedy fingers and Loki had put the tech into a pocket dimension. Tony would want it so, they were sure. They had taken Rhodes’ suit too, because when SHIELD couldn’t get a hand on Tony’s suits, they would of course try to get to Rhodey’s.

  
But all these things did matter only little to Loki. He feared the torture SHIELD was certainly capable of. He feared that they would somehow use Tony’s magic as a weapon. He was afraid that when they rescued him he wouldn’t be Tony anymore.   
The three of them worked heard on a rescue plan, but the mortals needed rest. Loki had exhausted his magic in the last days; he had woven spells around their hide-out so that SHIELD couldn’t find them. Although they wouldn’t be able to stay long in one hide-out. Soon they would have to move again and that would only hinder them in their rescue-mission. The days flew by and desperation clawed at Loki’s heart. Every second, minute and hour that went by he lost a part of Tony and some time it would be too late and his son would be gone.

  
He sighed deeply and buried his face in his hands. His tears came unbidden, but he didn’t stop them. He was so tired of putting up a mask in front of the others. He was tired of the fear in his heart; he was tired of losing everyone he loved. But he couldn’t allow himself to be weak. He had to be strong, because Bruce and Natasha relied on him and of course for Anthony, his wonderful son. He wiped away the tears angrily and wanted to turn around, but lightning stopped him. He heard thunder and his heart stopped. With trembling legs he ran outside and stopped dead the second he saw the big figure standing in front of him. Blue eyes stared at him with determination and warmth. “Thor?” Loki whispered weakly. The thunder god smiled, full of love and sorrow. “Don’t worry, brother. I’m here to help.”  
  
Tony kneeled patiently in the white room and stared at the opposite with half-closed eyes. The second reason he loved to go on a mission were the colors. Outside he could see green, red, blue, yellow and many more. Inside he could only see white and black. White walls, black chains. White coats, black uniforms. White sedative, black guns. He sighed and shifted. It was so boring here, but the only thing he was allowed to do, was to kill for _them_. Sometimes he would remember the feeling of flying and the wind in his face, but he couldn’t remember when that happened, because the only thing he remembered was _there_. And after _they_ brought him sleep, the memories (or dreams?) would vanish for at least some days.

  
A door opened and he looked up to see a man with a white coat. The man smiled friendly at him and motioned for him to stand up. Tony complied although some part of him protested. The man in the white coat looked into his eyes and adjusted meanwhile his collar. Tony never asked why he was the only one wearing a collar and chained, it was naturally for him and he couldn’t remember a time he wasn’t chained. “How do we feel today?”, the man asked with false happiness. Tony scoffed and didn’t even answer that stupid question, because he felt empty. The man only smiled friendly. “Do you know where you are?” was the next question. “ _There_.” Tony answered. “And what did you do today?” “I killed.” “For whom did you kill, to you know that?” “I killed for _them._ ” The man nodded. “Good boy, you can sleep now.” With that he pressed a button on Tony’s collar. Tony could feel how tiny needles broke his skin and something flowed into his blood. He felt dizzy and sunk to the ground. Tiredly he curled his arms around his knees and closed his eyes. He didn’t hear the man walk away and he was asleep when the man spoke into his ear-piece. “The weapon is now sedated, sir.”  
  
Many miles away Loki stared disbelievingly at his former brother. The blond god hugged him tightly and clasped his arm in the traditional greeting of Asgard’s warriors. “Thor.” Loki mumbled and still couldn’t comprehend the fact that his brother was here to help him. After all that happened he couldn’t believe that Thor didn’t hate him. “It’s alright, Loki. We will talk about the past later, but be assured that everyone has already forgiven you. Father and Mother miss you dearly, brother. But we don’t have time for that yet; we have to get Anthony back.” At the mention of his son Loki snapped out his thoughts and he took a few steps back with a sneer. “Does Odin approve of your help? Because the Allfather himself banished my son from Asgard and see where that got my sweet Anthony! It got him captured and maybe even tortured.” He growled and his hands began to glow green. “Calm yourself, brother. Father regrets his mistake dearly! You mustn’t hate him for a mistake that was made millennia ago!” Loki just growled at him angrily and had to restrain himself from attacking Thor. But another voice made him freeze in shock. “It’s alright, Thor. He has every right to judge me.” Odin said with a heavy voice and stepped out from the shadows. “Loki, I know I made a mistake. I banished your son and took away your family. I lied to you about your heritage and I’m very sorry about every mistake I made. I beg your forgiveness and bid you to come home. We will free Anthony and I will happily grant him Idunn’s apples. You can come back to Asgard, home. Frigga misses you dearly.” The king stared at his lost son with sorrow and regret in his eye.

  
Loki was stunned. Odin and Thor did not only want to help him, no, they begged his forgiveness and wanted him to come back home. He thought of Asgard, the golden city. His mother was there and he missed her, too. He could give Anthony the apples and they could live there forever. In an eye-blink he made his decision. “I can’t forgive you everything.”, he told Odin and Thor, “but I am willing to go back home. But under one condition: Everyone who helped Anthony and me in our fight against our enemies is allowed to come with us to Asgard, too. I don’t know if they want to, but some of them can never go back to their old life because they helped us.” Odin nodded in agreement. “Your friends may be allowed to enter Asgard. If they prove themselves as worthy they may even have a golden apple. But we must hurry. Heimdall and Frigga await us.” Loki led the two other gods to his hide-out where they met the still sleepy-looking Bruce and Natasha. They started to discuss possible rescue-plans but all Loki could think about was his Anthony. _Soon we will get you out of there, my son._  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a native-speaker, I'm sorry for any mistakes. Feel free to point them out!


End file.
